.:Wisdom Teeth:.

Yesterday. 

5:00PM.

I entered the Dentist's office. 

There I sat with a numb mouth.

I heard horrible noises, and I felt a terrible pinching in my two bottom Wisdom Teeth. The numbing substance made me shake, and I became very cold. As I lay there in anticipation of when the horror would be over, there were several times where I was inclined to reach up and grab the dental assistance arm (the inclination to do this was due to the spiking pain I felt at random in my bottom teeth). 

6:00PM.

My mom walked in, and without even the knowledge that my top two Wisdom Teeth had been removed, I was done. Before leaving the Dentist's office they informed me that they had nicked a bone on the lower right hand side of my jaw and that the swelling on that side would be quite greater than the other side. As I returned upon my home, I began to cry from the frustrations of a swollen mouth. However, I was comforted when I slipped into a warm bath and remembered that this pain wouldn't last forever. 

Later that Night.

As my mom gave me my pain pills and retired to bed, I began to watch "Breakfast at Tiffany's". Just when I was somewhat comfortable and I thought the horror was over, I began to feel uneasy and nauseated. I tried to sip water and I had some yogurt, but despite my efforts, the nausea only began to increase. I spent all of last night and early this morning in and out of consciousness and attempting to puke in hopes that I would be relieved of this poisonous feeling. 

As of now...

I am in severe pain, for I am scared to take my pain meds. For every time I seem to try and attempt to take pain pills of any sort I become quite ill. And the sickness that I am tainted with after taking the pill(s) is much worse than just pushing through the soreness of my swollen jaw. I lay here in my bed, quite puffed up and pale, in hopes that full recovery is not to long away. 

In the sense of recovery:

"There's no elevator, you have to take the steps."

.:Kombucha Juice:.

Last Night.

I went to the store and bought some Kombucha Juice. 

This Morning.

I drank some Kombucha Juice.

2 Minutes Later.

I decided Kombucha Juice, despite its health benefits, is quite fowl tasting.

Sorry blog, and sorry to myself, and sorry to anyone who enjoys reading my blog. I haven't posted recently. But don't worry I plan on writing a lengthy piece tonight when I return from school and other mandatory activities. 

.:Seasons:.

As I woke up this morning I looked outside only to see the snow was gone... This year of seasons have been weird. Anyway while thinking of the seasons I stumbled upon one of my old poems:


Seasons
Slowly summer is in transition, but spring still lingers, hanging like evil men in dead air. Looking for a place to start its' infection of color; while we wait in pale grey and cold winter rains.


Feeling no warmth from a sun that still slumbers in his plush comforter of clouds. Meanwhile we wait in our chambers filled with artificial light. Dozing off to better places, yet too eager to stay long in a dream...


And it reminded me, as the seasons change with waves of unknown weather, we change in motions only know to ourselves as well. 

.:Oh it's inevitable:.

.:Change:.

I've learned that change is inevitable. Whether you like it or not, everyone and everything will change with time. But the only change we have control over is the change over ourselves. I always let myself get caught up in the choices that others have made. Thinking somehow it was my fault or that I could have done something to change their minds, but I now know it was their choice all along. We can try to guide the direction of someone else's decisions but in the end they are the ones who must choose for themselves. We don't have control over events that sometimes effect our lives either, but what matters is how we react to those life changing moments.

"I am the master of my fate, I am the captain of my soul." 

- William E. Henley

:.Individuals:.

Individual. 

Cold. The word in which describes my room at the moment. 

Red. The color of my feet.

Soft. The adjective that may be used to describe the skin on my hands.

Curious. The state my brain is in. 

We are all individuals. We all use different words to describe the various things in our vastly different lives. You can wish for as long as you want to be someone else, but in the end you will be none other than who you are. So instead of envying the life of someone else, instead of dreaming of the life you want, instead of pretending that you know it all... Go out and make something of yourself. Go searching so that you can know it all. Dwelling on the thoughts of things not yet accomplished is a mere waste of time. It's when you turn those thoughts to actions that you are making something of your life. If you feel like the background on a canvas, then go paint a new picture where you are the center of the masterpiece. Don't let life slip through your fingers. Make each moment count. (Cliche, but true) Be inspired, recognize the beauty that surrounds you each day, take the chance to travel. Don't be the clay, be the artist. Go find yourself. Dare to explore. 

Be an individual. 

Happy. The attitude I choose on a daily basis.

Open-Mind. Is the mind I have.

Travel. It's what I do whenever the opportunity presents itself.

Fearless. The way we should all live our lives.

.:Taylor Jay:.

.:Taylor Jay:.

This year I've become someone in which I never expected to see myself become. Before you came I was shy, reserved, and didn't have very much self belief. When you made it into the play, and we became friends my eyes were opened. Because you are so beautiful I was able to see the beauty in myself. Your kindness, allowed me to not be afraid of opening up to people. Your courage made me brave. Anyone who knows you and has had the opportunity to have you in their lives are very lucky people. You are an amazing, selfless, honest, smart, wonderful human being. I will never take our friendship for granted, you have helped me to see who I really am. All night adventures, random phone calls, driving around just because we needed to escape, sob sessions and venting, Sleeping Beauty, haunted houses, playing in the park, sitting on roofs, running through graveyards and from the cops, all our "would you rather questions", watching Gossip Girl, making webcam videos, and spamming up peoples walls on Facebook, I will never forget you and you are honestly irreplaceable. I hope you know how much you mean to me, and that you are more than a best friend, you are family. I will always be here for you no matter what i'm doing or where i may be in the world. I cannot wait for Thailand, and hopefully many more adventures to come. Taylor Jay Bevan, from Australia. Who ever knew my best friend was half way across the world this whole time, you coming to America was a monumental decision, and not only has it changed your life but everyone's life in whom you have befriended. Never let anyone change you, because you are perfect the way you are. 

Peace Tea and Cheesy Dip with Dorritos, I will always love you!

-Samii aka Sleeping Beauty aka Caramel <3 

.:To a New Year:.

With a new year comes new goals, ideas, adventures and life lessons. 

When the clock strikes midnight, the new year will be here. The year of 2011 will be set in time and the color will be transferred to 2012. And although the years that have past are stained black and white the lessons that have been learned will never fade. Each step in time that we take is another chance to learn something new. As my new year rolls in I know I have a lot that I need to be ready to face: getting a job, preparing for my last year of high school, traveling, and of course the unknown. Like water takes the shape in accordance to the vase it's put in, we must be willing to accept change and be brave enough to take on whatever is thrown at us. If there is one thing I've learned this last year it's that you can't be afraid to live. Living in the shadows of the world, hiding from fear of rejection, and avoiding all opportunities to try something new, all these tactics are nothing more than the hopes to escape life. But what's the point of living if you don't try to experience life? We are here to learn and discover what's out there. As one of my goals this year I decided to extend myself to the world by starting a blog. So in an end to my first official post I will say Happy New Years! Look forward to much more posts to come. 

"For last year's words belong to last year's language and next year's words await another voice, and to make an end is to make a beginning." - T.S. Elliot